Look no more.....
1. Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and shows signs of starting to dig.
2. His students would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.
3. I would not allow this instructor to breed.
4. This associate is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definitely won't be.
5. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
6. Has a problem with student questions. Consistently answers with "I'm not sure I completely understand the question", pauses and goes back to the current overhead.
7. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
8. This woman has delusions of adequacy.
9. He sets low personal standards and the consistently fails to achieve them.
10. This employee should go far -- the sooner he starts, the better.
11. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
12. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
13. Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't looking.
14. A room temperature I.Q.
15. Got a full six-pack, but is missing the plastic thingy that holds it together.
16. A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.
17. A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.
18. A prime candidate for natural deselection.
19. Bright as Alaska in late December.
20. One-celled organisms outscore him in I.Q. tests.
21. Donated her brain to science prematurely.
22. Fell out of his family tree.
23. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the trains isn't coming.
24. This man has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
25. He's so dense, light bends around him.
26. If brains were taxed, he would get a rebate.
27. Any dumber and he would have to be watered twice a week.
28. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you would get change back.
29. If you stand close enough to her, you can hear the ocean.
30. It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.
31. One neuron short of a synapse.
32. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he gargled.
33. Was left on the Tilt-A-Whirl a bit too long as a baby.
34. Not the brightest bulb in the chandelier.
35. Claims to have seconded Al Gore's motion to build a ubiquitous global multimedia network based upon IP technology during the early 60s.
36. Thinks SS7 is a new type of supersonic aircraft.
37. Thinks IP is actually a complete sentence and that IP on Fiber is a real technical version of it.
38. Tried to get cash from an ATM Switch.
39. Recited a Shakespearean Sonet to a group from BellSouth Science and Technology, and wasn't joking. Needs remedial training.